Key occasions
GOAL! Newcastle 0-1 Everton (Alcaraz 64)
WHAT THE ACTUAL! Everton have taken the lead at St James’ Park by a sensible header from Carlos Alcaraz. As issues stand, Newcastle – arguably the shape crew since Christmas – are out of the Champions League locations.
64 min: Fulham 0-1 Manchester Metropolis The web tells me that is solely the third sport in English top-flight historical past with no English gamers in both beginning XI. If this comes up in Prime Minister’s Questions, I’m off to Dangar Island.
GOAL! Tottenham 1-2 Brighton (Hinshelwood 64)
Jack Hinshelwood strikes once more! This one appears like a effective objective, backheeled previous Vicario. “What a end!” says Kris Boyd on Sky Sports activities.
60 min: Man Utd 0-0 Aston Villa Hojlund has a shot saved by Villa’s sub keeper Robin Olsen. Villa have been hammered – however one measly objective, for them or Everton, would carry them into the highest 5. With that in thoughts, Youri Tielemans and Jacob Ramsey are about to return on.
“Given it’s the final Clockwatch of the season,” begins Andy Flintoff, “will there be a montage of the very best MBM and Clockwatch bits interspersed with the names of all of the individuals who have helped (or not) over the previous 9 months?”
We will try this, yeah why not. There’s a 74.27 per cent likelihood my mind will explode earlier than I attain September, however I’m on it.
No, no I’m not. However within the absence of an MBM montage, right here’s an all-time basic. Each phrase of American (sic) commentary got here from Scott Murray’s MBM.
The most recent scores
Proper now, St James’ Park and Outdated Trafford are the place it’s at.
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Bournemouth 0-0 Leicester
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Fulham 0-1 Man Metropolis
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Ipswich 1-2 West Ham
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Liverpool 0-1 Crystal Palace
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Man Utd 0-0 Aston Villa
Emi Martinez despatched off -
Newcastle 0-0 Everton
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Nottm Forest 0-1 Chelsea
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Southampton 1-1 Arsenal
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Tottenham 1-1 Brighton
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Wolves 0-1 Brentford
GOALS! Soton 1-1 Arsenal (Stewart 56); Ipswich 1-2 West Ham (Bowen 55)
A effective header from Southampton’s Ross Stewart means David Raya and Matz Sels will share the Golden Glove – or, because it’s identified colloquially, the Banksy™.
And Jarrod Bowen, Fantasy Footballer par excellence, has restored West Ham’s lead. Is it me or is every little thing s Bowen nonetheless a bit underrated?
GOAL! Nottm Forest 0-1 Chelsea (Colwill 50)
Levi Colwill has put Chelsea forward, tapping into an empty web after Pedro Neto bobbled the ball throughout objective. Large objective, that, and the Champions League highlight is now on Newcastle.
Disallowed objective! Man Utd 0-0 Aston Villa
Rasmus Hojlund can’t catch a break; he’s simply had a close-range dominated out for a marginal offside. In the meantime…
GOALS! Tottenham 1-1 Brighton (Hinshelwood 52); Ipswich 1-1 West Ham (Broadhead 52)
Jack Hinshelwood’s second objective in per week places Brighton again in eighth place… yeah.
46 min: Liverpool 0-1 Crystal Palace Trent Alexander-Arnold has changed Conor Bradley at half-time. I’ve solely simply converted however the reception sounds much more constructive than in opposition to Arsenal.
“Maybe, Rob,” begins Paul Griffin, “Liverpool must attempt to emulate Tottenham’s sample of relentless, fuss-free back-to-back game-winning.”
That is our final Clockwatch of the Premier League season, so on behalf of everybody at Guardian Sport I’d like to provide heartfelt thanks in your firm and emails all through the season. We couldn’t do it with out you!
Truly, we may do it with out you. We don’t even pay you for heaven’s sake! But it surely’d be nowhere close to as a lot enjoyable.
Half time: Southampton 0-1 Arsenal
“An opportunity for the Arsenal followers at Southampton to wave goodbye to these departing; fondly within the case of some – take a bow goal-scorer Kieran Tierney – and very fondly certainly for some others, however for fairly totally different causes,” says Charles Antaki. “It’s unhappy that Raheem Sterling’s profession ought to fizzle and fade out so dismally, however good luck to him if he manages to get a gig someplace to ease the transition into retirement.”
He’s solely 30, pretty younger by trendy requirements, however he was a daily at 18 so he has a whole lot of miles on the clock.
It’s a soccer fing
“Due to your Black Grape reference, I went down a little bit of a Shaun ‘best poet since Yeats’ Ryder rabbit gap and came upon the Blissful Mondays had recorded a music for the 2007 soccer film Aim!” writes Kári Tulinius. “It’s referred to as Playground Superstar and it sounds about as healthful as you count on from the Mondays.”
Additionally they launched England’s Irie forward of Euro 96. It’s as nice as you’d hope (or, within the pursuits of steadiness, as unhealthy as you’d count on in case you are one of many unfortunates who doesn’t like Shaun Ryder.)
Half-time studying
Soccer isn’t a matter of life and dying…
Bryan Mbeumo’s objective was his twentieth of the Premier League season, which places him fourth on the Golden Boot listing. (We actually ought to name it the race for the Greavsie.)
Half-time scores
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Bournemouth 0-0 Leicester
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Fulham 0-1 Man Metropolis
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Ipswich 0-0 West Ham
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Liverpool 0-1 Crystal Palace
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Man Utd 0-0 Aston Villa
Emi Martinez despatched off -
Newcastle 0-0 Everton
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Nottm Forest 0-0 Chelsea
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Southampton 0-1 Arsenal
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Tottenham 1-0 Brighton
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Wolves 0-1 Brentford
And that is the as-it-stands league desk. One objective for Forest – or Everton for that matter – would change every little thing.
45 min: Liverpool 0-1 Crystal Palace “Certainly they might have crammed Anfield with sand for this one?” says Niall Mullen. “Particularly as Liverpool’s again 4 look like enjoying in flip-flops.”
I’ve loved how sincere Arne Slot has been in regards to the meaninglessness of the previous couple of outcomes Most managers speak the same old nonsense about giving it 100 per cent, subsequent season begins right here and all that. Slot has mainly been a human cigar since Liverpool received the league.
45+3 min Hojlund went spherical Martinez, who may and in all probability ought to have let him go. As an alternative he bodychecked him in probably the most brazen method. It was so apparent that he may as nicely have screamed “Ave it!” as he despatched Hojlund into area.
It was absolutely the incorrect resolution; Hojlund may not have scored, and even when he had Villa would absolutely want to be 1-0 down with 11 males than 0-0 with 10.
Emi Martinez despatched off!
45+3 min: Man Utd 0-0 Aston Villa A giant twist within the Champions League race. Money’s wretched backpass is seized upon by Hojlund, who’s inexplicably worn out by Martinez 25 yards from objective. Hojlund would in all probability have scored nevertheless it wasn’t a positive factor from a tightish angle on the left.
GOAL! Ipswich 0-1 West Ham (Ward-Prowse 43) Jarrod Bowen pounces throughout a mistake within the Ipswich defence and units up James Ward-Prowse to attain. Bowen is ruthlessly environment friendly within the final third.
GOAL! Southampton 0-1 Arsenal (Tierney 43)
A very nice second for one of many good guys – Kieran Tierney has put Arsenal forward in his final sport for the membership, ending crisply from Ben White’s cross.
40 min: Bournemouth 0-0 Leicester Evanilson has missed a very good likelihood to place Bournemouth forward. Bournemouth can’t qualify for Europe however they’d nonetheless love to complete within the high half; proper now, with Crystal Palace forward at Anfield, they’re eleventh.
Premier League newest scores
The final day of the season often means an orgy of objectives. As we speak, not a lot, no less than not but.
37 min: Man Utd 0-0 Aston Villa It’s one-way site visitors at Outdated Trafford, the place the house aspect have had eight makes an attempt at objective, 5 on course, to Villa’s none.
Can Manchester United rating? They sometimes rating.
33 min: Newcastle 0-0 Everton Anthony Gordon dives to win a free-kick and will get a pious, hard-faced telling-off from the aggrieved Everton defender, Ashley Younger.
I feel soccer may have jumped the shark.
31 min: Nottm Forest 0-0 Chelsea There’s an extended solution to go, actually an hour, however as issues stand a objective for Nottingham Forest would put them into the Champions League locations. You possibly can comply with that sport with Scott Murray.
30 min: Bournemouth 0-0 Leicester Oliver Skipp thought he’d given Leicester the lead; VAR had different concepts and the objective was dominated out for offside.
28 min: Man Utd 0-0 Aston Villa Diogo Dalot has simply smacked the publish after one other thrilling little bit of wingplay from Harrincha. Man Utd will hope this can be a trailer for subsequent season as a result of they’re enjoying fantastically.
“Hello Rob,” says Ollie. “Is anybody right here sufficiently old to recollect the final match Liverpool received?”
25 min: Liverpool 0-1 Crystal Palace
“Good as it’s for Liverpool to provide Palace a guard of honour,” begins Tim Woods, “I’m disillusioned they didn’t simply get out a picnic hamper and take it in turns to problem Eze to a leisurely sport of chess. It wouldn’t have been an enormous stretch, given how they’ve taken already-on-the-beaching to new ranges these previous weeks.”
Premier League newest scores
The Champions League race, because it stands
GOAL! Fulham 0-1 Man Metropolis (Gundogan 21)
Metropolis take a deserved lead by an improvised, close-range overhead kick from Ilkay Gundogan, his first Premier League since returning to the membership. Metropolis solely want a draw to qualify for the Champions League so they need to be effective now.
GOAL! Wolves 0-1 Brentford (Mbeumo 20) Bryan Mbeumo combines with you-know-who to provide Brentford the lead. He and Yoane Wissa actually ought to come as a pair in the event that they go away Brentford.
As issues stand, Brentford are in eighth place and may but qualify for the Convention League.
“Man Utd are completely battering Villa,” says Rick Harris. “Mason Mount is abruptly enjoying just like the participant he was at Chelsea and has had three possibilities already with Martinez fortunate that the third hit Hojlund because the keeper was wrong-footed.
“The place has this United aspect been all season?”
Unsure. The Kerguelen Islands?
GOAL! Tottenham 1-0 Brighton (Solanke 17 pen) Spurs take the lead in opposition to the run of play. Mathys Tel is fouled within the penalty space, Dominic Solanke does the needful from the spot.
“I’d be mendacity if I mentioned I’d shared Steph Jones’ optimism about Liverpool’s season in August (or any time up till the final whistle in opposition to Tottenham, if I’m sincere), however I’ve to agree that it’s been nice enjoyable,” says Matt Dony. “Within the league, so few unhealthy outcomes (till it didn’t matter). Some nice performances, some regular performances, and some performances that we may charitably name ‘environment friendly’, however at all times a way that the gamers had been genuinely giving their all, working collectively, making an attempt to win video games AND entertain. In a number of hours, I’ll begin worrying about subsequent season. However proper now, let’s get pleasure from no matter occurs. All collectively, now; #AR-NE SLOT, Da da, da, dada…#”
As anyone who thought he was the world’s most pessimistic soccer fan till he met you, I love your self-awareness.
13 min: Man Utd 0-0 Aston Villa United have began with stunning brilliance – “the very best I’ve seen them play this season” in response to Clinton Morrison on Sky – however have missed some first rate possibilities to take the lead.
13 min: Ipswich 0-0 West Ham “I’m performing on a movie set outdoors Istanbul and it’s drizzling,” says Rob Lewis. “I’m enjoying an American millionaire whose spouse is having an affair together with his daughter’s fiance. Sure, that is Turkish drama. It means I’m going to overlook about my solely West Ham sport this season. However we Irons have seen little drama and a whole lot of dross in 2024-25, so farewell to not very a lot.”
GOAL! Liverpool 0-1 Crystal Palace (Sarr 9)
Palace get the primary objective of the day. Conor Bradley’s move out of defence is intercepted by Tyrick Mitchell, who performs a effective early by ball to Ismaila Sarr. He runs off a leaden-footed defence and drives a low shot previous Alisson.
Has Arne Slot taken Liverpool so far as he can?
